In Defeat
by Shitza
Summary: While Naruto is dying, he reflects over his relationship with Sasuke, and the things he regretted. Deathfic, partly YAOI, OneShot


_This is my first try of a Naruto One-Shot that I decided to write, almost like an echo of thought. It's written in POV, though I won't say whose. You'll find out. I thought I could need a break from As the Season Fall, my considerately larger project at the moment, and a One-Shot suits perfectly for these things. I hope you read and enjoy it. It was a new experience for me to write. _

_**Disclaimer:**_

_I don't own Naruto, and you better wish I did not. Though if I would I would make sure Orochimaru was out from the picture. _

_**Copyright:**_

_You are probably taking this as a joke, but if I find someone copying this chapter, putting it on another document and giving it out in their name I will make sure I'll alert the whole Swedish law-system and make them pay for that. This is free read, my work and copycats beware!_

_**Warning:**_

_Slight OOCness, it was really difficult to write compared to everything I've written other times. _

_Shitza_

_Ps: This story has nothing to do with anything else I've written. It's a One-Shot with no ties to anything else except for the anime and manga themselves. _

**In Defeat**

In defeat, I saw you lying by my feet, eyes so wide staring into my very soul. Your Red Sharingan, that would never light out, gazing into my heart. Yet those eyes were as well unfocused, dead... blind to what you probably had seen in me as well. Eternal Friend and Rival... Forever Lover and Candle in the dark. Shining like a sun, you thought so of me.

In defeat, you lay beneath me, your breath has since long died, your hands lost their warmth, your lips stopped speaking my name. Telling me to shut up while you were thinking. Telling me that I was not like you, while we really were equals. Telling me that love didn't exist, but then, what is this feeling deep in my chest? I feel broken, my world shattered when you died. It became a hollow universe where I gaze upon the happiness of others, while my own will forever be lost.

In defeat, we all loose something, we all suffer from a task. But does a defeat mean breaking into a endless river of despair. I never said I loved you, never out loud. This is a world where our kind of love isn't welcome. And yet my eyes have always followed you. Seen the hidden you, the real flower, the true soul. I saw you when you cried sitting in front of your family's memorial, i saw the smiles as you watched little kids play. You are good at hiding your feelings, your mask is as you are... perfect.

In defeat, the stars shine above us, the moon smiles down as my warm lips touches you. But you will never know of the one who truly loved you. Who cared for you, more then a brother. Why did I follow you all the way, and try to take you back? Wasn't it because I had feelings for you, feelings I couldn't let go of. Did you have any idea how you haunted my dreams? How your eyes made me smile? How your voice haunted my every step? How my heart broke for the first time when you decided to join Orochimaru and leave me behind? How I struggled to find you, not believing you would be dead? How did I even manage?

In defeat, I feel that our bond weakened through the years we were separated. As the years passed your thought swayed from me, how power consumed you and darkness took you away. I will never forget the smile you once showed me, long ago, the only smile I have ever seen you smile towards me, the loser. I will always remember that smile, treasure it more then the stars and moonlight. Treasure it more than the necklace of my dreams that hangs like a burden around my neck, reminding me of foolish dreams. I never thought I would ever abandon those dreams, until now.

In defeat, you were always better then me, outsmarted my moves and did everything flawlessly.

In defeat, however you sold your soul, and your goal. You forgot our friendship. You forgot the fun we had, our fights and saw me as worthless. A simple obstacle in your way for you own foolish dreams, dreams you will never again be able to try and accomplish. I saw it happen when He took you, as you traded your life for his goals. He stole your beautiful pale skin, your eyes and your breath... but never your heart, because it had already died long ago. Your very soul died, and was replaced by his, stinking snake.

In defeat, I had to fight him, instead of you. While my eyes deceived me telling me I was fighting you, my heart screamed it was just an illusion. He punched me, burned my mind and killed my inner organs one by one. But he couldn't kill all of me, the last of my soul freeing out powers I did not know I possessed. His soul finally left you, and you whispered my name. I was so happy.

In defeat, my own wounds are making me dizzy, my eyes darken and I can no longer hear. Images of us play before me, as I try to keep my knowledge of whom I was, and whom you were.

In defeat, we all realise our own stupidity and wish that a lot of the things that happened, wouldn't have happened. And that things we would have wanted to do, that we had done those.

In defeat, I gaze upon your pale face as my body finally gives in for the eternal rest.

In defeat, it doesn't matter. I will always love you.

In defeat, the sky darkens and the rain falls down upon us.

In defeat, I die beside you.

* * *

**Explanations:**

For those who didn't understand this very short 8my shortest ever) One-Shot it was literally the aftermath from Naruto's fight that resulted upon the death of Orochimaru. Yes, Sasuke became his new body, but was killed shortly afterwards. Naruto had loved Sasuke for a while, never confessed and is now regretting it. Until he died.

_Inspiration for this, uhm... scary little One-shot came from a dream I had a while ago, when i actually dreamt I was dying and slowly forgot who I was. It was kind of scary, feeling your body disappear and trying to obtain some sort of life around your thoughts, who were ebbing away. _

_I surely hope I won't need more nightmares like those again. Brrrr..._

_Hope you liked it, I know it's weird and not my best job ever. Not to mention, short! (strangles herself)_

_Shitza_


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